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Why other drivers hate me so much
Why do other drivers hate me? Why does my family call me “The driver from hell”? I don’t speed, I always check twice, I make sure when I stop I can see the wheels of the car in front of me – what’s...
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Torture by Epilator
There is one thing I hate about my Maltese heritage. Body hair! I know that beards are in fashion; and a bearded lady even won Eurovision last year. But really, I’m so over it. I remember going to...
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The Idiots: How NOT to attract women
A true story about the family idiots: Two young men (brothers – and NOT my sons!) were on the beach, conspiring about how to attract girls. They came up with a plan; an allegedly brilliant and...
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The Squirrel Grip
What do you do when your hand accidentally contracts around your colleague’s testicle? That was the dreadful predicament I found myself in recently. I probably shouldn’t talk about this horrific...
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Looks like food. Tastes like …
I’m not ashamed to admit that I have the – occasional – cooking mishap. I should just NOT cook food. EVER. End of story. Son: Mmmm. Mum, you should taste Karen’s cup-cakes! Nom Nom Nom Me:...
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Worst door-to-door salesman EVER!
Him: Hello, my name’s Bwian. Me: Brian? Him: Yes, Bwian. And what’s your name? Me: Cathy Him: Hi, Caffy, how are you? Me: It’s Cathy. Him: That’s what I said … Caffy. How...
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sss SNAKE!
You DON’T want to hear from your child … “Mum, if we tell you something, will you promise not to get us into trouble?” Oh Lord, what had my 12 and 14 year olds done when I was out shopping? The boys...
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